Here’s the thing: What you do today shapes who you become tomorrow.
Every little action you take adds up. From when you wake up, what you eat for breakfast to how you spend your free time all contribute to the person you’re becoming.
So, it makes sense to be aware of our actions. And choose them carefully.
If I talk about myself, I have not been very careful about my actions for the past few years. I did a lot of things without much thinking about it. That’s when I experienced the pleasure trap.
But before we discuss that, let’s first see how our actions can be roughly divided into two categories:
1. The Tempting Ones
These actions feel good at the moment but become painful once you are done with them.
For example, binge-watching TV shows might feel great when you are doing it. You get lost in the story, feel a rush of excitement, and want to find out what happens next. So, you keep clicking “Next Episode” as if your life depends on it.
But once the show is over, you suddenly feel empty. You’re back in the real world, which is boring. And then you feel guilty for spending so much time watching TV instead of doing your work.
Similarly, mindlessly scrolling social media delivers quick bursts of pleasure, but after wasting hours, you realize you have lost focus and productivity, and you’re left with nothing but regret.
Excessive drinking, smoking, eating junk food, or skipping sleep might offer temporary pleasure. But the after-effect is awful. You get hungover or feel depressed or have long-term consequences for your health and well-being.
Doing nothing also falls in this category. It feels amazing to relax, daydream, and do absolutely nothing. But after years, one day, you wake up from this sleep and realize you have lost precious time and failed to achieve your dreams. That’s when the regret hits you like a ton of bricks.
Still, we all get addicted to these actions. Why? Because they provide immediate pleasure.
Now, let’s move to our second category of actions:
2. The Challenging Ones
These actions are tough and painful at first. They may be difficult, boring, scary, uncertain, or all of them. But they ultimately give you the best kinds of pleasure and lasting rewards.
For example, walking, running or working out in the morning can be hard, but once you do it, your body releases feel-good hormones called endorphins, which put you in a positive state of mind. Besides, exercising improves your health, strengthens your mind, and helps you get in shape, which makes you feel good about yourself.
Learning a new skill or reading a book might feel challenging, but once you have done it, it gives you a sense of accomplishment, opens doors to new opportunities, and improves your life.
Similarly, traveling alone, speaking in public, or having difficult conversations may seem as scary as facing a hungry Bengal Tiger, but they make you mentally tough, confident, and happy.
Still, we tend to avoid these actions. Why? Because they give us immediate pain.
So, that’s the pleasure trap- the tendency to choose actions that give instant, short-term pleasure but long-term pain.
“When you buy into short-term pleasure, you are investing in long-term pain.”
― Scott Allan
But Did You Notice this Fact…
Pain is common in both categories of action.
The tempting actions have delayed pain (the worst kind of pain). This is the pain of regret, missed opportunities, low self-esteem, and the consequences of unhealthy choices.
Whereas the challenging actions have immediate pain (the sweetest kind of pain). This is the pain of discipline, hard work, facing your fears, and pushing your limits.
So, you can’t avoid pain.
No matter what you do.
But you can choose the kind of pain you experience.
Those with strong minds and discipline delay the pleasure and accept the temporary pain. Because these are the actions that will ultimately lead to a happy, rewarding, and meaningful life.
And that’s how you break free from the pleasure trap.
“We must all suffer one of two things: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret or disappointment.”
-Jim Rohn